Wednesday, August 26, 2015

NYC Journalist Jeff C Stevenson Writes About the Monster Larry Hill Who Still Lives On Fortney Road

Christal Cooper

*Article With Excerpts -4,054 Words

**All excerpts from Fortney Road:  Life, Death, and Deception in a Christian Cult have been given copyright privilege by Jeff  C. Stevenson


Through The Writer’s Eyes:
*Jeff C. Stevenson’s Experience On Writing  Fortney Road:  Life, Death, and Deception in a Christian Cult


It’s estimated there are 5000 active cults in the United States today. Five thousand. So what happened to the men, women and children at Fortney Road is likely occurring at this very moment.”
Jeff Stevenson

       In 1976, 17 year-old Jeff Stevenson was in Southern California captivated by the Jesus Movement when he first became aware of Cult Leader Larry Hill by reading a magazine advertisement on the album reissue My Poor Generation by the All Saved Freak Band.
       “The album cover featured a bearded preacher wearing an Amish hat and pointing menacingly into the distance. That preacher was Larry Hill.”


       One year later, Jeff Stevenson was preparing to graduate from high school in Southern California totally unaware, that at that precise moment Larry Hill, leader of The Church Of The Risen Christ, was showing his followers, specifically second in command Diane “Dee Dee” Sullivan, how to property beat eleven-year old Bethy Goodenough in Larry Hill’s house on Fortney Road.




Finally, Bethy managed to escape and careen down the stairs, running toward the dining room and screaming for help as Diane chased her relentlessly.  At that point Larry Hill, 42, furious at being disturbed by the commotion, came into the dining room demanding to know what was going on.  Instead of putting an end to the beating, however, he grabbed the whip out of Diane’s hands and shouted, “You’re not hitting her right!  You’re not breaking her spirit!”
With that, he shoved the child to the floor and continued to horsewhip her for another ten to fifteen minutes while Bethy frantically tried to protect her legs, head, face, and chest with her hands.
Finally, her strength depleted, Bethy’s agonized shrieks and pleas gradually diminished, but Larry kept on whipping her until she was completely still and silent.  Then he stopped, his discipline a success, her heart and spirit completely broken.
Excerpt from Chapter 1:  “Where a Breaking Occurred”




       Today Reverend Larry Hill is not that well known, but everyone who knows of him know of his true colors- not that of a loving Bible-carrying minister, but a cult leader of the Jesus Movement who is narcissistic and abused his followers sexually, physically, mentally, and spiritually without any sign of remorse or regret.


       The 1970s was a different time period – anther world that almost has no semblance to today’s world.  There was Nixon, Watergate, Patty Hearst, Charles Manson, Jim Jones, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and the ever up and coming popular movement called The Jesus Movement.








“Back in the 1970s during the Jesus Movement, the term “born again” Christian was new and—unlike today—had no affiliation with any political or social or religious group or denomination. The term has been hijacked and attached to beliefs and political and social ideologies I do not support and I doubt Jesus would either. Let’s just say I’m a believer.”


       Stevenson became a believer at the age of 15, when he met a high school girl who became his friend and carried a Bible The Way, which featured high school and college aged kids on its cover.


       “It was very unique looking and I didn’t even know it was a Bible.  She asked me to her Presbyterian youth group and I went that weekend and on Sunday evening, May 5, 1974, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace and security when I asked Jesus into my life and became a believer.”
       Stevenson also became a big fan of the legendary contemporary Christian singer Keith Green with the release of his 1977 debut album For Him Who Has Ears To Hear.  


He would attend his numerous concerts throughout the Southern California area and soon was attending Green’s Friday night Bible study at the Green home in Woodland Hills.



“One evening I asked if he would play at my high school. Each high school club was given a section of the campus to promote their interest and I was president of the Maranatha! Club and was given half the auditorium. Keith came to play and when he started, maybe 20 people were in attendance. Within ten minutes, the place was packed and more than 200 students came to hear him.”
It was around this time that he attended a potluck dinner at Keith and Melody Green’s house where he met Glenn Kaiser, a member of Resurrection Band, and asked him about what he knew about the All Saved Freak Band.  


All that he (Glenn Kaiser) could recall about the band was that the women couldn’t look the men in the eye.  He didn’t really know why.  More than thirty years alter, I was about to find out the reason.
Excerpt fromChapter 16”




Stevenson latter purchased two more of the All Saved Freak Band albums: Brainwashed and For Christians, Elves, and Lovers. 



And to this day, I’ve never heard any music like that recorded by the All Saved Freak Band

Rachel Khong described it very well in the October 15, 2004 issue of the Yale Herald:  “(They) lived on a five-acre lot of land in Windsor Ohio (and) wrote songs and recorded in Cleveland, eventually releasing My Poor Generation in 1973.  It was surprisingly good – part folk, part garage, part psychedelic, part blues, and part who-knowswhat.
Excerpt From The “Prologue”



       In 1980, Stevenson completed his All Saved Freak Band’s collection by purchasing the final studio album Sower.



The extensive apocalyptic commentary on the back cover and inside sleeve, written by the Reverend Larry Hill himself, was both fascinating and repelling.
Excerpt From The “Prologue”


       It’s not surprising that Stevenson chose writing as his career field – maybe somehow deep down inside he knew that he would be writing about Larry Hill and his community and the horrific events that occurred on Fortney Road.   He moved to New York in 1983 where his writing career took off.



“I work as a freelance copywriter for various New York advertising agencies, and am also a writer, photographer, film publicist and producer of, Thomas Tessier’s World of Hurt. My work has appeared in PRISM magazine, where my article “Bury Me Standing” was awarded the editor’s choice, and I’ve also contributed entertainment items to the New York Post’s Page Six.”



In 1998, Stevenson turned his album collection of the All Saved Freak Band into CDs and it was around this time that he began to hear rumors on the Internet about the All Saved Freak Band’s dark history led by Reverend Larry Hill.



There were horrific allegations about what went on in the Christian commune where they lived during late 1960s and early 1970s.  Had peace, love, and rock and roll for Jesus really turned into something sinister?
Excerpt From The “Prologue”



I think (the rumor) was on a site called http://new.exchristian.net/ where someone mentioned visiting Larry Hill’s property and sensing something was seriously wrong with the few people he or she saw living there. I wasn’t surprised since I had heard about things for years, but I was intrigued that someone was so impressed by what they saw, they posted about it to warn others.”  Stevenson said in an email interview.


       It wasn’t long after that Stevenson came across the All Saved Freak Band website (http://www.allsavedfreakband.com/)  and contacted Joe Markko, who co-founded the band with Larry Hill. 


The two struck up a friendship, which resulted in Stevenson’s article based on his interview with Joe Markko about the band and it’s four albums titled “Everything You Always Wanted To Know About the All Saved Freak Band (But Never Had The Chance To Ask).”



       It is also resulted in Stevenson offering his expertice in marketing and promotion of the CD Joe Marrko was putting together:  Harps on Willows, the best of the All Saved Freak Band.
“I wrote up press releases and sent out hundreds of CDs to the mainstream and Christian press as well as radio stations.”



       In May of 2006, Stevenson got the nerve to ask Joe Markko about his experiences with Reverend Larry Hill and what really happened at Fortney Road.


       “It was by phone that I asked if he wanted to tell me his story. He said he’d get back to me and a few days later, he emailed me and said he’d like to tell his story, so I began to write up some questions for him to answer by email and by phone over the weeks that followed. When he would have a lapse in memory, he’d say, “You should talk to Carole about that… ‘Leon’ would know better than me…” and so forth, and he eventually contacted those people and they agreed to be interviewed.”


       As a result Stevenson was able to interview 17 people who each had his/her own individual but similar experiences with Larry Hill on Fortney Road.   Some of the individuals were Carol King Hough, Morgan King, Bethy Goodenough, Tim Hill (Larry Hill’s son), Daryl Pitts, Bob Tidd, and Cookie Markko.  


 “Others wanted to tell me their experiences but didn’t want their real names used. In all, I was able to interview 17 people who lived at Fortney Road.”


       Soon word got out to the journalist community that Stevenson was researching and writing a book on Larry Hill, his so called group and the horrific events that occurred on Fortney Road.  Journalists contacted Stevenson via email and via phone to give encouragement.  One of those journalists who encouraged Stevenson to continue his work was Dick Feagler of the Cleveland Plain Dealer. 


       “He said, “I’ve written a lot of stories over the years but Larry Hill left me with a real impression of something; he was creepy, spooky . . . It’s going to make a great story—I’m glad you’re telling it!” Dick was able to get me copies of the newspaper stories he had written about Larry and they helped tremendously in documenting the story and confirming the timeline of events.”



       The horror of Larry Hill is geared in his conception of religion, spirituality, his version of Jesus Christ, and his narcissist version of himself.  Larry Hill exhibited violent behavior – even times when he beat his own mother, which are well documented.


       It is well documented that Larry Hill, in the late 1940s was involved in a horrific car accident that left him losing his right leg, with two of the six passengers in the car killed.  Larry was thrown out of the car with so such force that his right leg was left in the car, and his body into the creek below.    
       The loss of his right leg was horrific at first, but soon Larry Hill used it to his own advantage and for ill-gotten gain.


       Larry moved along with the assistance of an ever-rattling pair of forearm, or Canadian crutches.  According to Joe Markko, “Because those white Canadian crutches rattled and creaked when he walked, he thought it suggested that his presence was a precursor to a judgment that was to come.’”


       Larry developed a drug habit that in addition to his already violent behavior made his behavior even more atrocious where he was beating his wife and three sons almost on a daily basis.



       In 1955, Larry Hill claimed to have gone through a spiritual conversion, which he wrote about in his own newspaper Freedom Bell:  “I got on my knees and mustered all the faith I could. I began to cry out to God in Jesus’s name. I knew I had no merit in myself and asked God to hear me because of Christ’s sacrifice, and praise God, I felt His presence. I felt my sins washed away, what joy and release! A new power entered my soul that made me a new man. Through surrendering to Christ, He broke my drug habit and gave me peace and love within toward myself and for others.”



      However, this change was only evident to the outside world as Larry continued to severely beat his wife, and children. Even his followers, at first, were not privy to his violent side:  he would not show his true colors to his followers until he had gained their vulnerability and trust. And money.   


A former member of Larry’s church emailed me, “The full monstrous tale of Larry Hill’s betrayals against men, women and children in the name of Christ needs to be told . . . child molestation, rape and brutality – he was nothing more than a Shadow Prophet – a dark, empty reflection of the real thing.  A destroyer of families, his own included, none of his children want anything to do with him, his two sons running away as soon as they were able.”
Excerpt From The “Prologue”




       After over one year of researching for his book Fortney Road, Stevenson was invited to attend the 2nd Reunion of the former members of The Church Of The Risen Christ and the All Saved Freak Band, which he attended in August of 2007.


“Writing is a solitary profession and journalists rarely, if ever, allow the subject to read or comment on what was written. But after I had more than 500 pages written and sourced, Joe invited me to the reunion and “Leon” suggested I bring copies of the manuscript for others to read and comment on. I felt that was the right thing to do since I had never met these people face to face yet I was asking them to trust me in writing their life stories. So everyone was given a copy of the manuscript. Corrections and suggestions were sent back to me weeks later. It was exciting to get their feedback and if they had corrections, that only added to the story since it shed more light on the darkness they had experienced.



I think I expected a rush of emotions when meeting them, especially after writing about such personal and horrific things that had occurred to them, but I really don’t recall any highs or lows. I think “sober minded” is the phrase that comes to mind; I was determined to get the story right so I focused on that, the facts, so my emotions were pretty much kept in check throughout the project.”


       It took Stevenson over seven years of research and writing before Fortney Road:  Life, Death, And Deception In A Christian Cult was published in 2015 by Freethought House.


 “For some reason I’ll never really understand, I’ve always been very calm and at peace about the writing of Fortney Road. Even when I met Larry Hill face to face, I had this tremendous calm, as if it was someone else facing this monster. You’d think that such a violent book would stir up a great emotional response, but I’ve always been very “cool, calm and collected” as the research and writing progressed over the seven years it took me to complete the story.”
       The most difficult chapter for Stevenson to write and research was “Chapter 16:  Boiling The Frog” since it revealed the grotesque details of what a typical day on Fortney Road was like. 


       The day began at 4 a.m. when all members were to get up and prepare for the possibility of The Great War, which Larry Hill claimed God revealed to him in the spring of 1965 as he was sitting in his mother’s living room.  Red China would invade America, over take Hawaii and Alaska.  Latin America would also invade victorious in America.  As a result, Larry Hill is searching for converts to join in hopes of saving them from The Great War.


       For those individuals who did not get up by 4 a.m., a punishment awaited for them – either a punch in the stomach, lashes with a whip, or running ten to fifteen times through a pond that was three feet deep in the middle of winter.




Immediately upon arising, Donald the Vietnam War veteran, would lead the men and women in forty-five minutes of grueling exercises, including hundreds of push-ups, sit-ups, leg lifts, and a quick two-mile run.  Some former members reported that they also had to carry a club or staff to increase the difficulty.
Excerpt From Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”



Following the exercise, the men rushed to feed all the animals and clean their stalls, which had to be cleaned morning and night, as quickly and thoroughly as possible while the women hurried to the farmhouse to prepare breakfast.

 

With the exception of Diane Sullivan and a few others whom Larry considered prophetesses, all the women were responsible for maintaining the farmhouse.  “The house was immaculate,” one woman said.  “We cleaned cracks on the floor with toothbrushes.  We really cleaned.  We did everything in the house every day – all the woodwork.  We shampooed the rugs once a week.  We’d wash curtains once a week.”
Excerpt From Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”



At 6 a.m. the men had to go back to the farmhouse, have prayer time by Larry, and then eat a breakfast prepared by the women of the commune.  
At 6:45 a.m. breakfast was over and the men had to spend the rest of their day in their assigned chores:  tending to the animals, repairing buildings, and working in the fields.  



The select few who owned broken down vehicles struggled mightily to stay awake as they drove about doing errands or completing their farm duties.  The rest left for jobs in the city or suburbs.  Glenn Schwartz was not just a guitar virtuoso, he was also a skilled car mechanic so he found employment at an automobile repair shop when he wasn’t working in the fields.
“Because the few vehicles we had were needed on the farm, we had to hitchhike to work,” Leon remembered, “and the job was sometimes as far as forty miles one way, a real chore in the winter.  So we would put in eight hours at work and then it was time to hitchhike home and start the evening chores.”
Excerpt From Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”



       After the evening chores, dinner followed, but not everyone ate:  numerous members were fasting either by choice or by force that could sometimes last up to two weeks at a time.  Sometimes there just wasn’t enough food to go around.  It was a difficult task to grow food (food would spoil by neglect or ignorance and make maggots appear) and storing the food, especially meat.  There was an incident where someone poisoned the meat by placing pinewood in the smokehouse. 


Although it was often more famine than feast at Fortney Road, Morgan recalled one Thanksgiving that the community had a huge dinner.  “We all just stuffed ourselves, it was so good to just eat and eat and eat!”  Then when the meal was over and no one could move, Larry made them all run twelve miles.  “We all just barfed our guts out, we were all so sick,” Morgan said.
Excerpt From Chapter 16 “Boiling the Frog”



       After dinner, which for some consisted of dog food or raw meat, Larry, Diane or Laura Markko would read lists of work assignments that needed to be completed by the next night.





       And then there were meetings in which punishments for the previous day’s sins committed by members were handed out.  Sometimes these punishment meetings could last up to five hours.  The punishments or disciplines were based on twenty Godly standards.  Some of the standards were to pray for an hour each day, memorize scriptures, maintain cleanliness, exhibit self-control, and witness to others.


Because it was so easy to violate these standards and cause “spiritual infractions,” most of the members began to live with the sense that no matter how hard they tried or how much they sacrificed, they would continue to come up short in their relationships with God and their pastor.  These feelings were enforced by Diane’s diatribes and Larry’s long, late-night sermons about how displeased God was with them.  He would often publicly humiliate individuals, singling them out for criticism in front of the entire group.  Church members felt they were continually disappointing the God who did so much for them; they couldn’t seem to do anything right.  And, since members of the community were also encouraged to point out failings in others to help everyone live a more godly life, spiritual finger pointing was the norm at Fortney Road.
Excerpt from Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”



       Some of the punishments given out were: running ten miles for not washing the goat properly before milking it; running five miles for not waking up on time; writing Bible verses over and over again; getting a beating with a riding crop or a bullwhip. These beatings would consist of up to forty lashes at one time. 


       By midnight, usually the punishment meeting was over and it was time for those to go to bed, except for the eight unlucky men who were chosen to do the watch list, in which teams of two men were assigned to go on rotating twenty-minute patrol to check the animals.  In addition, the tunnels were also dug, for people and the animals to hide when The Great War came.  


The community of believers at Fortney Road were so exhausted that they often went to sleep immediately upon sitting down.  This was a challenge when trying to stay awake for three-and four-hour church services, and a life-threatening problem when driving.
“We employed creative solutions for staying awake,” Joe said.  “Beyond the ‘stick your head out the window into the winter blast’ kind of therapy, some carried a cup of coffee in their hand and held it high enough to create a problem should they start to drift off.  My brother Randy used to hold a small ball-peen hammer in one hand, handle up, directly above his crotch.  It worked.”
Excerpt from Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”


Sundays were dedicated to memorization of the books of the Bible.  Larry Hill interpreted the writings of Stalin that all Bibles would be destroyed and felt his members together should be able to memorize the entire Bible.  As a result, he assigned books of the Bible to different members to memorize.


After hearing from so many former members what a typical day was like at Fortney Road, I wondered if there was ever anything to look forward to.  Only CarolE responded, saying, “I am going to try to think of a good time and I guess that would be if we were going to have band practice.  That made everything else at least bearable.  I can’t say it was ‘fun’ – maybe ‘relief’ is a better world, but it all depended on the mood Larry was in.”
And while everyone struggled at Fortney Road, it was the women who had the most difficult time pleasing God and Larry . . 
Excerpt from Chapter 16 “Boiling The Frog”



       There is only one debate now:  the psychoanalysis of Larry Hill:  Is he demon possessed, mentally ill, insane, or just plain evil?  
       “I did ask Jonathan Kellerman for his thoughts on Larry Hill. Jon is not only a bestselling author, he is also a psychologist and was very supportive of me over the years as I worked on the book. After he read Fortney Road, I asked him what he thought of Larry Hill and he told me, “Regarding your request for psychological insights into Larry, I’m afraid the answer is rather mundane:  all these guys are cut from the same malignant cloth:  charismatic psychopaths, a breed not unusual in the world of ‘new’ religions as well as politics.”


       When it comes to analysis of the followers of Larry Hill who finally were free from him and his teachings, Stevenson has the upmost admiration and respect for them.
       “For me, just surviving Fortney Road with your mind intact is a victory, regardless of where you are in your faith walk.”


       Today Larry still lives on Fortney Road with his second wife Diane, depending on money he gets from disability due to his leg, and the few followers he does have left.
“No one knows exactly what to make of Larry Hill, other than in no way is he a prophet. Yes, he is evil and he knew exactly what he was doing so no, I do not think he is mentally ill.




As for Larry not being held accountable for anything, as I wrote him when the book was published, “This book is your legacy,” and history will forever hold him accountable.”



Photograph Description And Copyright Information

Photo 1.
Jeff C Stevenson
Copyright granted by Jeff C Stevenson

Photo 2.
Jacket cover of Fortney Road

Photo 4.
My Poor Generation

Photo 5
Image 11
Diane “Dee Dee” Sullivan
In 1999
Photo courtesy of Douglas E Fair, The Valley News

Photo 6
Children on Fortney Road
Bethany Goodenough is the third from the left, wearing the bandana.

Photo 7
The house on Fortney Road in 2005.

Photo 8a
President Nixon announces the release of edited transcripts of the Watergate tapes on April 29, 1974.
Public Domain

Photo 8b
Watergate complex taken from a DC-9-80 inbound to Washington National Airport.
January 8, 2006
Public Domain

Photo 8c
Patty Hearst
Photograph of Patty Hearst in front of the insignia of the Symbionese Liberation Army holding an assault rifle. This image was taken during Hearst's time with the SLA and was released to the media to advertise that she had apparently joined their organization. Given its proliferation in the media, it has come to be the most recognizable image of both the SLA and Patty Hearst. According to court testimony, the gun is a modified full auto M1 Carbine with sawed-off barrel.
Public Domain

Photo 8d
Charles Manson mugshot at San Quentin in January of 1971.
Public Domain

Photo 8e
Jim Jones the day of the Jonestown Massacre
Public Domain

Photo 8f
Jimi Hendrix
Jimi Hendrix performs for Dutch television show Hoepla in 1967.
A.Venta
CCASA2.0 Netherlands

Photo 8g
Janis Joplin
Attributed to Albert Grossman
Publicity Shot
July 16, 1969
Public Domain

Photo 8h
Jesus Movement

Photo 9
Jacket cover of The Way

Photo 10
Keith Green’s For Him Who Has Ears To Hear

Photo 11
Keith and Melody Green
Web photo
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 14
Glenn Kaiser

Photo 14a and 14b
Jacket cover of Brainwashed

Photo 15a and 15b
Jacket cover of For Christians, Elves, and Lovers

Photo 17b
Back jacket cover of Christians Elves, and Lovers

Photo 18
One of Fortney Road web logos.

Photo 19
Jacket cover of Sower

Photo 20
Back cover of Sower

Photo 21
Twitter logo for Thomas Tessier’s World Of Hurt
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 22
Web logo for PRISM Magazine
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 23
Larry Hill

Photo 24
Web logo for www.exchristian.net

Photo 25
Web logo for All Saved Freak Band

Photo 26
The All Saved Freak Band started in 1968 with (from back left) co-founder Joe Markko on guitar, co-founder Larry Hill, piano; Mike (last name unknown), drums, and Randy Markko on bass.

Photo 27
Pam Massmann, Kim Massmann, Ed Durkos, and Larry Hill on the post- All Saved Freak Band Groups, the Magi.

Photo 28
Harps on Willows

Photo 29
Web page logo for www.FortneyRoad.com

Photo 30
Web logo of individuals who participated in the book Fortney Road

Photo 31
Jeff C Stevenson at the All Saved Freak Band Reunion in 2007 with reunion members in the background.
Copyright granted by Jeff C Stevenson

Photo 32
Fortney Road sign in Ohio.
Copyright granted by Jeff C Stevenson

Photo 33
Dick Feagler
Publicity Photo
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 34
The barn on Fortney Road in 2005

Photo 35
Larry Hill passing out a track fro the David Wilkerson’s Teen Challenge.

Photo 36
Larry on crutches

Photo 37
Illustrated chart of all the five visions Larry Hill claimed he received from God.

Photo 38
Larry Hill composing a song at the piano for the All Saved Freak Band

Photo 39
The All Saved Freak Band posing with Mayor Moon Landrieu, who is third from left.  Larry Hill is sixth from left.

Photo 40
Copies of Fortney Road
Attributed to Jeff C. Stevenson
Copyright granted by Jeff C Stevenson

Photo 41
Some former members of the Church of the Risen Christ and All Saved Freak Band and their spouses and friends at a reunion in 2006.
Photo courtesy of Joe Markko.

Photo 42
Reunion
SFB Reunion 2007. [Front] Ed Durkos, CarolE [King] Hough and Morgan King. [Back] Joe Markko, Norris McClure and Tom Eritano. Mike Berkey, Tim Hill and Glenn Schwartz were unable to attend. Photo credit: Jeff C. Stevenson
Copyright granted by Jeff C. Stevenson

Photo 43
Rare photo of Larry Hill from the 1970s

Photo 44
Jacket covers of Fortney Road

Photo 45
Freethought house web logo
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 46
4 a.m. wakeup call at Fortney Road

Photo 47
Publicity bookmarks for Fortney Road

Photo 50
Glenn Schwartz and Ed Durkos hard at work on Fortney Road

Photo 51
Illustration of Larry Hill’s first vision

Photo 52
Illustration of Larry Hill’s second vision

Photo 53
Illustration of Larry Hill’s third vision

Photo 54
Illustration of Larry Hill’s fourth vision.

Photo 55
Glenn Schwartz in 2007

Photo 56.
Web logo for www.fortneyroad.com

Photo 57.
Morgan King on the Fortney Farm.

Photo 58
Photo of Laura Markko from the Freedom Bell

Photo 59
The All Saved Freak Band in 1972: Randy Markko, Kim Massmann, Larry Hill, Glenn Schwartz, Pam Massmann and Ed Durkos.
Photo 60
The All Saved Freak Band from their summer 1976 tour, dressed in Colonial costumes for the 1976 Bicentennial. Larry Hill is at the far left playing piano and Glenn Schwartz is in front with the guitar.
Photo 61
Result of flogging someone.

Photo 62
Larry Hill from the My Poor Generation album
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law
Photoshopped by Christal Rice Cooper

Photo 63
Joe Markko today
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 64
Propaganda painting of Marshal Stalin during World War Two
Public Domain

Photo 65
Web photo of Jonathan Kellerman
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 66
Web logo of Jonathan Kellerman
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 67
Bamboo Forest National park in Prattville, Alabama
Attributed to Christal Rice Cooper
Copyright granted by Christal Rice Cooper

Photo 68

Web logo for Fortney Road

Friday, August 21, 2015

Julia Scheeres: Sex Was Fantastic! Love Was True! But Money Was Low! Which Should She Choose?

Christal Cooper




*Article 1,107 Words
First appeared in Marie Claire Magazine on December 10, 2014.  www.marieclaire.com
*Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres


Guest Blogger Julia Scheeres
For Love Or Money


*Julia Scheeres wanted a provider, but she fell in love with a man who earned way less than she hoped and drove a beat-up pickup. The sex was great, but how much was true love worth?

At the Berkeley café where we met, Tim leaned on the table, his T-shirt riding up over his curved biceps. I've always gone for swarthy types, and with his dark Irish eyes and widow's peak, he was even sexier in person than in his online-dating profile photo. Unlike other first dates who yammered on about themselves ad nauseam, Tim asked a lot of questions. I took a sip of my cappuccino and fantasized about him lounging in my breakfast nook, clad only in boxers. "Enough about me," I said. "What's your line of work?"


"I'm a graduate student in American history," he said. "I hope to teach someday." I put my cup down. Had he mentioned this in his profile, I would have deleted his message instantly.


I know that might sound shallow, but let me explain. My dad was a surgeon; my siblings and I grew up in a three-story house in Indiana and attended private schools. My home life was miserable, but money—or rather, the things money could buy—distracted me from my despair. Counting down to our annual Florida vacation kept me afloat on the bad days, as did making lists of everything I wanted for Christmas or buying a new pair of boots. Money provided tangible relief when I felt overwhelmed by the toxic emotions pulsing through our family. As I grew older, my measure of a man became his salary and ability to provide the comfort that once fell to my father.


Furthermore, as a writer—a miserably low-paying profession—I'd always gravitated toward boyfriends with pockets deep enough to cover our living expenses. I wanted a husband who could subsidize my artistic ambitions, and a teacher-writer pairing seemed destined for ruin, especially in the pricey San Francisco Bay Area.


When I met Tim, I was 35 and newly single after ending a long relationship. My ex was handsome and gregarious and earned a hefty salary. We were compatible in every area except one: sex. I craved it; he avoided it. We'd started planning our wedding when I realized that, after six years of initiating every sexual encounter with him, I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with a man who wanted to be "cuddle buddies."
I joined a dating website and met a series of men. None were a good match—too talkative, too egotistical, too jaded—until I met Tim. When he followed me outside after that first date to say good-bye, I could feel his raw maleness slinging horny arrows at me. "How about a hike Saturday?" he asked. "Sure," I shrugged, figuring I'd explore our attraction until a better candidate came along.


That Saturday, we followed a eucalyptus-lined trail at a park and found we shared many interests: a love of Cormac McCarthy, Spain, and hiking the Sierras.




For our third date, he invited me to the symphony. I dressed in black silk and wore diamond hoops. My heart sank when Tim pulled up in a dented pickup truck, and I hoped nobody saw me push open the creaky door and step out when we reached the Civic Center.


But on the drive back home, when he put his hand on my upper thigh and kept it there, I couldn't wait to ask him inside. "One last drink?" I asked when we reached my street. We sat on opposite sides of the sofa until he finally pulled me onto his lap. He kissed me softly at first, and when he left a half-hour later, I still wanted more. "Let's not rush this," he said.
The first time we slept together, it was sublime. Afterward, as we stared at the ceiling in wonderment, we both acknowledged that it was the best we'd ever had. Everything about him turned me on: his warm, broad chest; the way he called me "doll"; how he always seemed to be happy. 


But he was still a penniless graduate student, and I grew irritated when he complained about high menu prices or ordered the cheapest house red. 


Financial security became even more crucial a few weeks later, when I quit my job to work on my first book. I had no idea whether I'd be able to sell it before my meager savings evaporated. Tim's money worries only exacerbated my own.


At first Tim joked about our situation, but then he got fed up. "Look, I'm 36. My biological clock is ticking," he said as we cuddled post-sex one day. "I want a wife. I want kids." He accused me of being a "situational feminist"—only interested in gender equality when it benefited me. I knew he was right, but I turned away and refused to continue the conversation. He broke up with me the next day.


Two weeks went by and I felt like I was going through withdrawal. I didn't just miss the sex; I missed our friendship, our laughter, our discussions of politics and literature. Somehow, quietly, I'd fallen in love with him. I thought about my moneyed childhood and how unhappy and lonely I was for much of it. What I craved as a girl was love, which Tim offered in abundance.


I sent him a groveling e-mail. "Could we just meet for coffee? We don't have to talk," I said. My heart felt sore from missing him. My pulse quickened when he walked in. He told me he was dating a classmate; I was furious that he'd moved on so quickly and stormed out in a fit of jealousy. He trailed me to my car. "But you didn't want me," he said, his voice almost breaking. Then: "I couldn't stand it anymore because … I love you." Something relaxed inside me, and I buried my face in his chest. I knew he was the best man for me, no matter how little money he made.


With my commitment to Tim came a commitment to my career: I'd need to work harder to afford our dreams of buying a house in a decent neighborhood and taking vacations to Spain. Sometimes I feel a twinge of jealousy when my friends who married rich talk about second homes in Tahoe. That's the life my ex-fiancé offered me. But I also know the price many pay: Their husbands work late, so the bulk of the child care and housework falls on them. At our place, you'll find Tim cooking supper or dancing with the two little girls we now have. And while living on a shoestring budget can be stressful, we know of a fantastic tension reliever—one that deepens and renews our relationship every time we do it.



Photograph Description And Copyright Information

Photo 1
Marie Clarie web logo
Fair Use Under The United States Copyright Law

Photo 2
Julia Scheeres
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 3
Caffe Mediterraneaum Storefront on Telegraph Avneue in Berkeley, Califonria.  The Caffe is the self proclaimed creator of the Caffe Latte.
Photograph taken on 04 27 2009
Attributed to Surichkaa
Public Domain

Photo 4
Tim Rose
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 5
Family photo, Julia Scheeres bottom, far right
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 6
Julia writing at the San Francisco Grotto
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 8
Lover’s Lane in Presidio National Park
Web photograph Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law
Photoshopped by Christal Rice Cooper

Photo 9
Jacket cover of The Cormac McCarthy Journal
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 10
Julia Scheeres lived in this tiny flat in Valencia, Spain across from a 12th century church in the early 1990s.
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 11
The Scheeres-Rose Family in the Sierras
June of 2014
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 12
The Berekely Symphony web photo
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 13

Photo 14
Baccio Bandinelli Belvedere’s Torso
Public Domain
Photoshopped by Christal Rice Cooper

Photo 15
1907 Painting
Attributed to Maga McClure
First published in McClure’s Magazine in March of 1907
Fair Use Under the United States Copyright Law

Photo 16
Jacket cover of Jesusland

Photo 17
Grey Line With Black, Blue, And Yellow
Attributed to Georgia O’Keeffe in 1923
Fair Use Under The United States Copyright Law

Photo 18
Woman Crying
Gustav Klimt painting
Public Domain

Photo 19
Tim Rose and Julia Scheeres on their wedding day.
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres

Photo 20
Tim Rose/Julia Scheeres family photograph
December of 2014
Copyright granted by Julia Scheeres