Christal Cooper
“The Scarred Woman Walked Here Once”
in The Mad Farmer’s Wife
by Rita Sims Quillen
You cannot call it healing
just scarring.
A woman walked here once.
excerpt,
“Traveling Through”
The life of The Mad Farmer’s Wife by
Rita Sims Quillen (Texas Review Press (http://www.texas
press.org) is one of loneliness, isolation, depression,
invalidation; until the very end, where she finds triumph.
The Mad Farmer’s Wife (MFW) is lonely and
feels useless in this world of farming – where most of the day the only things
she has to keep her company are herself; animals; landscape; her children
(whenever they are around); crops; and the Mad Farmer (MF), her husband.
Herself
Numerous lines from the first poem of this
collection “Traveling Through” describe the state of the MFW’s mind and spirit.
Careless footfalls as
she tries to walk off the pain
of knowing that love
isn’t enough
Nothing is enough,
there is no good enough
The MFW finds parts of herself to keep her
company but the writer in her fails to meet her expectations.
There is nothing here
she can save
even with her pen.
excerpt,
“Traveling Through”
Words are no help on a
farm.
How sad to be good at
something unnecessary.
excerpt,
“A Woman Born To Farming”
Animals
In the “Chimney Sweep Mother” the MFW and a bird’s
mother have something in common –living children without access to them.
Each year
she nests in my
daughter’s bedroom.
Each year, more cruel
than nature,
I carry the nest away.
In “The Mad Farmer’s Wife Delivers the Foal’ the
MFW identifies with the mare who delivers the stillborn foal – because both
have lost their children – the mare to death the MFW to distance.
It is the turning I
remember
She only raised her
head again, stared
at what could never be
then looked away.
In
“The Grey Fox” the MFW comes face to face with a part of herself that cannot be
denied – that of the wounded animal caught between two worlds.
flashing beauty
against the blinding snow
limping along the
fence inside the yard,
the artificial
boundary between
the world and the
wild.
The
climax of the poem is the silent but profound,
spiritual commun-
ication the MFW and the gray fox participate in.
regal and ramrod
straight
he sat down and stared
intently
at me through the
window
The
gray fox has chosen the MFW to be his witness of his own violent death.
already a ghost,
my memory his only
heir
before coyotes
delivered his fate.
The
MFW recognizes the serious responsibility of being an heir to a magnificent
being, and as a result she is now full of purpose and meaning.
What an honor to be
sought
by what’s broken
to be called to
testify
for one on trial for
his life.
In “What’s Important In A Graveside Photo
-1989” the MFW describes the landscape as barren, full of broom sedge, and “deadly thistles/
that smelled like judgment.”
In “Four Women in Front of a Sod House” she describes
the landscape “where wind doesn’t condemn” and where “clouds can’t scold.”
In “I Woke Up Late” the landscape (rises/ and
falls like a heartbeat across the pasture.)
There are other landscapes that are
mentioned in this poetry collection in the form of the persona poem where the
mountains speak in “What The Mountains Say;” where the creek speaks in “What
The Creek Says;” and the rocks speak in “What The Rock Says.”
The Mad Farmer
In “Calving” she describes the bloody wrestling match
that the humorous MF and cow, who is giving birth, participate in.
The Mad Farmer untied
the cow
then did a quick
sidestep like Fred Astaire
when she tried her best
to kill him.
In “He Tells Her A Love Poem” the MFW tries to
understand her husband but cannot which leads to resentment and anger.
You are the why
in every sore muscle
and bloody blister
the root of every
tangle
every strike of an ax
every shovel full of
dirt
turned in search of
the key
to your heart’s
puzzle.
In “The Mad Farmer Dances” the MFW recognizes
the sacrifices her husband has made on her behalf and his willingness to die
for her but it still is not enough "not the
same as saying she’s happy."
Children
In “When the Children Come Home” the MFW and the
MF can never fully celebrate their homecoming:
we don’t kill the
fated calf
but we do cook both
ham and turkey,
casseroles and pies
and fruit,
table groaning under
the sacrament
borne of blood and
absence
every visit prodigal
in its intensity
but not really:
Because they aren’t
staying.
In “A Woman Born To Farming” the MFW has a
bounty of fruit; but even this bounty makes her feel void.
She gathers
raspberries and blackberries,
the stains’ temporary
tattoo
her only recognition
for her work.
The poem “A Poet’s Vegetable Epiphany” is the Mad
Farmer’s Wife’s validation as a poet:
she sees the crops as part of a
poem and herself as the poet; thus her sanity and peace are reclaimed.
as if the garden was
created by a poet
someone who knew
we need things to
gather and eat
the juice dripping off
our pens.
In “The Mad Farmer Dances” the MFW finds
stability and refuge in her memory:
No, what holds her is
memory
that blows by
like the starlings in
the summer’s quiet,
quick and brief but
color so vivid:
The last poem “October Dusk” the MFW views
her husband not as someone who is embittered, wasting time, or one who has lost
his competence – but her equal lover and co-inheritor of the earth:
He sits quietly by me
memories of the day’s
work
swift moving color
shared
like fall leaves in
the yard.
The potatoes from the
garden
lie scattered in the
grass.
Tomorrow we will sort
them
and store them for winter.
His hand rests on my
neck
as he slowly stands.
He offers the other
dirty hand
to help me up.
Our eyes meet in the
fading light
We go inside
surrendering to night-
the smell of earth still strong.